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Posts published in “Off The Press”

Off The Press is a satirical Opinion column written and organized by Off Center, often used to joke about current Stevens issues and campus news. It is currently organized by Matthew Brantl.

Why is winter so cold?

As the cold wind blows like the most recent test you took, goosebumps rise like the cost of the standard of living and teeth are chattering like monkeys.

Top four newest restaurants in Hoboken

One of the greatest parts about Hoboken is the variety of food options that are available. From mushroom flatbreads and baked zitis to chimichangas and nachos to palak paneer and vegetable vindaloo to ramen and sushi and impossible burgers and waffle fries… Do we need to go on?

U.S. looking to ban popular holidays

In a surprising turn of events, the United States government has recently enacted new legislation to ban some of the most popular holidays that people like to celebrate: New Year’s Day, Valentine’s Day, Easter, Fourth of July, Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas.

New majors offered at Stevens

At Stevens, we are excited to expand the possible curriculum we can offer to ensure that we get a diverse range of students that can possibly exceed all possible possibilities.

A Classic Indian Folktale

Today, at Off The Press, we decided to get a little multicultural and dive into underrated folktales from other countries. And here is one of the most famous folktales from India!

How are Off The Press articles made?

So far this semester, Off the Press has been getting all kinds of wacky stories, from smart people taking over the world to discovering why Pierce food is bland and that the sky is blue, to stopping spies from other colleges and evil wizards, to celebrating Christmas with Atilla the Duck.

Breaking News: alternative fairy tales II

Recently, in the far southwest part of northeastern Hoboken, there has been a series of various strange events that have been occurring, featuring talking animals, sorcery, and the occult.

Random news

Recently, on December 22, 2023, there has been a new law proclaiming that all students in New Jersey must obtain a dog.

Invisible sorcerers responsible for cold weather at Stevens

So far, there has been a sharp increase in the accumulating cold weather around our campus. Gone are the days of the warm summer sun, turning into a freeze-fest where goosebumps start popping out like jack-in-the-boxes as our bodies try to look for warmth.