As previously written about in this column, where the Wesley J. How Center now stands, there was a Victorian manor known as Castle Snevets.
The Stute
To set the scene, it was a dark and windy night on campus (when is it not windy) and I was heading to Bagels On The Hudson.
A recent meta-study conducted on the students of Snevets surrounding the percentage of students named Steven showed some surprising, and possibly concerning, results.
On a bright spring morning, I woke up (to my very shock) NOT to the sounds of birds banging their heads against the Jonas Brothers Hall windows and chirping extremely loudly.
In a stunning turn of events, shocking the historical community here at Snevets, the Samuel C. Williams Library has decided to sell all of its possessions to the highest bidder in an all-out bidding war that has left collectors and enthusiasts watching their backs.
In a groundbreaking move, Snevets Academic Course Plans have been dramatically restructured to allow for a much less challenging undergraduate and graduate experience.
Why is Ethan angry all the time?
Ethan: I’m not, just on Sunday evening when I have to answer your questions.
The projected overall freshman GPA for the 2023-2024 school year has dropped dramatically in contrast to the current freshman class average after Snevets released its admissions decisions for the regular decision applicant pool for the incoming class.
The commencement speaker for the Class of 2023 has been selected, and The Stupe was able to gain insider information on the potential candidates.
The St*te has long been a highly esteemed student publication, tasked with the difficult yet necessary duty of recording the history of Snevets Institute of Technology.