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Posts published in “The Stupe”

Who needs S.S. Snevets? Defective 737 to become dorm

The recent petition to restore the old floating dorm to the Hudson may have ended in failure, but loath to disappoint, President Narfarvar announced something even more unique: A Boeing 737 will be turned into new first-year housing.

My last April Fools

My last April Fools for senior year never felt so heavy. I am still shocked at whoever jumped the unskippable cutscenes of college.

South Tower Dedicated: Balles Tower

I would like to dedicate this article to all of my fellow Ducks who, to this day, do not know the North Tower is really Harries Tower.

Alleged Secret Society Lives in Academic Buildings

I have uncovered an alleged secret society of Snevets students that live in the academic buildings at night. Upon preliminary investigation, I found they have three distinct sectors.

The Most Wackiest Darn News You Ever Have Read!

Today was such a wonderful day. The sun was out, shining the brightest it could ever have been. People everywhere were laughing, smiling, and all out having a good time because it was such warm weather, a direct contrast to the days and even months of relentless cold weather.

Rumors of “Gateway East” permeate campus

Super real screenshot of Google Maps by Abba Yacobs

The appearance of a third wing of the Gateway building would certainly be noteworthy — if such claims could be substantiated.

Cog & Square: Shaping the Perfect Snevets Student

The Gear & Triangle Honor Society has tried for years to shape Snevets students into respectable, well-rounded student leaders – yet it has become painfully apparent that it has failed to achieve its founding goals.

The keys to success

So obviously, you’re here reading because you want to hear all of the excellent advice I have to give, so this week is no exception: I will be revealing the keys to success, the secrets to how to succeed, or more precisely, how to get a solid Victory Royale in Fortnite.

HASS renamed HTITS

Upon discovering that nobody thought, “Ah yes, like the avocado.” Our steadfast school of humanities has once again decided to rebrand.