Posts published in “Off The Press”
Off The Press is a satirical Opinion column written and organized by Off Center, often used to joke about current Stevens issues and campus news. It is currently organized by Matthew Brantl.
We at Off the Press pride ourselves on being up-to-date on all of the goings-on here at Stevens, which is why we are all so disappointed that no one told us about this major news story.
Lemon, the school’s alternative to the popular e-scooter rental Lime, is set to release next month all around campus.
Dreams of finally being able to access 6th Street have been temporarily crushed
“Believe us, this change was entirely necessary and please stop asking us about it. Please.”
According to the Emergency IT Department, the virus has been described as “bad,” “very bad,” and “dear God let us go back to defeating this demon code.”
My time at Stevens is quickly drawing to an end. Like any graduating university could tell you, my time was incredible and I’ve made lifelong friends and it’s an experience I’ll never forget and all that stuff.