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If you say you do this enough, you’re lying

It’s no secret that happiness is in short supply. On the news, across social media, and virtually all around us, we’re bombarded with sadness and negativity. Sometimes, it feels impossible to stay sane when it seems like the rest of the world is falling apart. But that’s exactly why we need to stay strong and keep pushing forward — because that’s the only way we’re going to get out of this.

The other day, I was sitting on Babbio Patio and looking out toward the city, taking in the beautiful view. And I thought to myself, “Wow, we are so lucky to be here.” People pay millions for a view of Manhattan like the one we have, and we get it as part of our tuition. But around campus, I feel like not everyone feels that way. All I hear is people complaining about the Pierce food, how they don’t like their professors, how the construction is waking them up in the morning, and the VLE keeps crashing on their computer. I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with complaining (it’s part of what keeps us human) but I do think there’s an issue with complaining too much and not taking the time to counteract it by purposefully taking a positive mindset. That’s what leads us down the path of consistent unhappiness.

When all we do is complain about how bad things are, we start to miss the good moments happening around us; or if we do, they’re so fleeting that they don’t stick with us. You’d be surprised at how much having a different mindset affects your mood. But it seems that a lot of us have gotten stuck in this rut of comparison and complacency. So how do we fix it?

I actually picked this tip up from a TED Talk I was watching online. Whenever you have a moment where you can sense yourself being ungrateful or just feeling down in general, try thinking of five things you’re grateful for. In fact, how about you — yeah you, the one reading my column — try it right now.

Was it harder than you expected? It was for me the first time I tried it. We’re so used to pointing out the things that are difficult in our lives that we’ve nearly forgotten how to take in the good things. That fact is leading to a poisonous mindset among virtually everyone. I truly don’t think anyone can say with complete honesty that they are thankful and appreciate everything they have often enough. I sure don’t.

Now, I would like to point out that I’m no therapist. If you’re struggling with something serious, then saying “thank you” a few times is probably not enough to get you out of your slump. But if you woke up on the wrong side of the bed or you just need a pick-me-up, than I would give it a try.

If you’re really stuck, let me give you one of the five right off the bat:

You’re at Stevens. Take a moment, no matter what year you are, to think about all the hard work it took you to get here. All of that studying, early mornings, cramming for SATs and APs. No matter if Stevens was your reach or your second choice, we all worked hard to get here. And all that hard work is paying off in the beautiful view of New York City, spontaneous trips to Broadway shows and football games, and in the friends that we’ve found in the countless opportunities Stevens offers. Sure, there are a few things to cause a hitch in our happiness, but are we really going to let that drag us away from how thankful we are?

Let’s make a pact to go against the grain. An agreement not to fall into the ease of negativity and a toxic mindset but instead to focus on the positive and happy. It’s not going to fix all the world’s problems, but it’ll start us on the right track.

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