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The Stute

Priority Registration reinstated for all Pinnacle Scholars

Two weeks ago, the Office of the Provost reinstated priority status for students currently in the Pinnacle Scholars program. This reinstatement comes after the Provost’s Office had stripped priority status from many groups on campus, including those in the Pinnacle program, back in late February.

Us

Jordan Peele delivers yet another captivating and clever horror film with strong rewatchability. Us (2019) follows Adelaide Wilson (Lupita Nyong’o) and her family as they vacation at their beach house and are met by a family of red-jumpsuit-wearing, gold-scissor-carrying doubles.

New Zealand Acts to Stop Mass Shootings. Why Not U.S.?

Last month an avowed white supremacist shot to death 50 people in two mosques in Christchurch, New Zealand. The shooter carried out the slaughter with weapons, including an AR-15 semiautomatic rifle with a high-capacity magazine, that he had purchased legally, according to the BBC. 

Snevets announces new leased housing options

Following the closing of Hayden and Davis Halls to make room for the erection of the new student center, also known by its codename, the “Narfarvar Towers,” a large wave of upperclassmen have been forced off campus.

Eric Londres releases list of demands

Campus suzerain Eric Londres has released his list of demands for Snevets after the Snevets government capitulated early last week, ending the four-semester-long war between the two superpowers.

Mwisho wa Watoto

Hii ni barua ya wazi kwa baraza la mawaziri la SGA 2019, kutoka kwa mwanachama mwenye kazi (na aliyehusika) wa chuo cha Stevens.

S*cialism gone too far

“I was dragging my feet after taking an exceptionally challenging physics exam. That is when I saw them, huddled in a circle that was showered in immense sunlight.

Yes, I like Piña Coladas

Hello, I am writing into The Stupe to respond to an ad posted in last week’s personals column. Whoever wrote it was looking for someone who likes Piña Coladas, and I only have one thing to say in response: Yes, I like Piña Coladas.