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Posts published in “The Stupe”

The Cat in the Hat falls flat

The Cat in the Hat is trite and derived, But the truth, my friend, is it’s the worst book for bedtime, deprived.

Co-opitis

You’ve heard of senioritis — that fog that settles over your final year, where motivation drops and everything starts to feel “optional”.

Swift’s new release on shuffle

I’m sure you’ve heard it by now. The amazing, groundbreaking, record-smashing new album by Taylor Swift. Swift’s 13th album is entitled Karma.

Giya Dressingonit is dead!

On March 27, 2025, a harrowing missing persons investigation came to a grim close late into the night as The Stupe’s Editor in Chief, Giya dressingonit was presumed dead in a tragic Davis Hall fire that set the UCC ablaze. 

Notes from a daily Scrum

Editor’s note: This is documentation purporting to contain notes from a so-called “Scrum,” that arcane and masochistic ritual particular to certain breeds of software engineer.

Snevets commencement to be virtual

As the commencement ceremony date quickly approaches 2024, the administration has released a concerning announcement for this upcoming spring: commencement will take place over Zoom this year following many issues in the past years and while letting graduating students reminiscent of their high school graduation over Zoom in the height of the pandemic. 

Who needs S.S. Snevets? Defective 737 to become dorm

The recent petition to restore the old floating dorm to the Hudson may have ended in failure, but loath to disappoint, President Narfarvar announced something even more unique: A Boeing 737 will be turned into new first-year housing.

Alleged Secret Society Lives in Academic Buildings

I have uncovered an alleged secret society of Snevets students that live in the academic buildings at night. Upon preliminary investigation, I found they have three distinct sectors.