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Posts published in “The Stupe”

Removal of elevators from residential towers!

As many of you know, Snevets had to end the physical education requirement last year due to lack of funding. Apparently PE teachers were charging extra because they had to drag some students out of their rooms to get them to participate.

Library to bid off all collections, including da Vinci Code

In a stunning turn of events, shocking the historical community here at Snevets, the Samuel C. Williams Library has decided to sell all of its possessions to the highest bidder in an all-out bidding war that has left collectors and enthusiasts watching their backs.

Editorial

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What question should I ask this week?

Why is Ethan angry all the time?

Ethan: I’m not, just on Sunday evening when I have to answer your questions.

Techflex: a fashion disaster

The prestigious New York Fashion Week (NYFW) event is to be hosted in Snevets’ very own, overhyped, glorified conference room: Techflex.

New football program drops overall freshman GPA

The projected overall freshman GPA for the 2023-2024 school year has dropped dramatically in contrast to the current freshman class average after Snevets released its admissions decisions for the regular decision applicant pool for the incoming class.

D4 project gone wrong: new sun created

With finals on the horizon, it’s going to be a mad dash to the finish with projects, unfinished homework, and tests.