Who lives on a secret island on the Hudson? Khoda! As we said the super secret name out loud, one that’s totally not listed on DuckLink, the clamor in The Stupe GBM grew louder and louder. “Who is Khoda?” many questioned. Let me remind you guys again. Khoda is a leadership honor society whose mission is for members to “use their networks to connect with various organizations, leaders, and administration on campus to more successfully address concerns and accomplish initiatives to enhance the quality of student life at Stevens.” Simply put, it’s a group of highly involved students working to make student life better.
Although this raises the question: Where exactly is this improvement being discussed?
In the past, The Stupe mentioned the idea of a secret lair on Babby Patty, and drew analogies to The Twelve Dancing Princesses to unlock the secret stairwell to a lair. Khoda could possibly have a lair, but why stop there when they can have something just a bit more dramatic for the monumental difference they are making on campus? Perhaps something off campus, somewhere quiet, isolated, and exclusive. Like an island in the Hudson far, far away, where they discuss meaningful conversations about student life, leadership, and the future of campus, it only makes sense that they have it in a secluded area away from campus itself.
And of course, these conversations probably include Snevets’ favorite topic: AI. How students navigate it, how it is developed, how it is used for research, and even researching AI itself. Naturally, Khoda has to stay on top of all of this.
One can only assume that on this completely hypothetical island, Khoda members lounge in cozy redwood chairs in a study room, planning how to train state-of-the-art AI systems while discussing ways to help students keep the school ahead in the great AI race, or maybe they are completely against AI. Who knows?
And of course, they have these life-changing conversations in their super secret observatory on the island, debating which programs get more funding, how new initiatives should be rolled out, and which voices are included in important decisions on campus. I don’t know what they talk about, but I do beg them to please address one pressing issue: getting better food on campus. If we are supposed to fuel the school’s AI mission, surviving on Yella’s burgers and Tu Taco quesadillas is getting really hard.
Disclaimer: This article is part of The Stupe and is satire
