Random food for thought: There’s not much to be afraid of when you’ve already lost everything that matters.
Disclaimer: I have recently broken my hiatus with tweets in columns for this one article. Sorry, not sorry.
This column may be dedicated to the bucket load of people that I recently unfollowed and removed from my follower’s list on various social media platforms. Look, honestly, it had absolutely nothing to do with you. That being said, I am not going to say it had a lot to do with me either. Rather, it is the scarcity of good vibes which were there aeons ago, it is difficult for me to pinpoint now. If you are one of those people, you’d agree with me too.
Ever since I was a kid, I had a really hard time connecting myself to a particular institution or even a particular friend group. I found it so weird when people would be nostalgic about school or even friendships. A couple weeks ago, I was talking with a friend from high school and they casually mentioned the presence of certain cliques. As you may have guessed, I didn’t realize the people mentioned were of certain cliques. I found every single person to essentially be from one clique — a cohort of uber competitive, and insanely bright college bound students.
To me, they all represented one mind, one body, one vision. Different faces, but one strong, unified personality. I considered myself to be decently smart for that cohort but I never felt attracted to the group. I wanted to be on top of classes obviously, but I was also passionate about learning about markets and trying to understand how I can price the correct exit of my investments (futile intentions, I know). My peers seemed to be glued to the 30 AP courses they took every year. Grades were important obviously otherwise I wouldn’t be here writing this piece. But I will not tolerate being merely recognized for material achievements. I wanted something deeper, and I craved to see a deeper passion in my peers other than As on exams. They were a nice bunch of people and I’d greet them if I ever saw them again. But for me, I never saw what their true passions and personalities were in high school so I never felt compelled to connect with them.
That’s what college changes.
You all decided to attend this university because there was a particular major that struck a chord in your passions, that fire to change your life, a sustenance for your soul. You meet all these other people who become your lifelong friends upon graduation. These are the people who will always be seen as that starry-eyed freshman in your eyes, walking down the stairs of Babbio telling you all about insane market anomalies. You interact with like-minded peers in your major, and upperclassmen who share their experiences in industry and in coursework. College becomes a meeting of minds where passion is greeted with passion, and gifted by ambition.
If you were to see my close friends list now, you would not be able to pinpoint me as being in one particular friend group. After everything I said about my high school experience, I do have a handful of lifelong friends from high school. My closest friends are people who have taught me a lot about the world with our friendship. They ended up staying in my life long after high school because I was intrigued by their passions in their respective fields. They continue to inspire me to be a better person, the same way my college friends here at Stevens empower me every day. Some love blasting EDM, while some love belting Taylor Swift whenever given the opportunity.
So the purpose of this week’s column is for you to think about the impact that relationships have in your life. Keep the ones that build you up and allow you to breathe and grow into a better you. Think again about those who you might merely be following, but not leading.
For me, the quality of my commitment to any one organization and the support system that grew out of it was more important than working up the ladder. Leadership positions to me are just a title. They do not hold value until I am capable of going above and beyond with my time management, decision making, and communication skills to leave the organization in a better place than when I joined. If you feel like you are merely in touch for some follower clout, but have not taken the time to ask how the person is doing today, maybe it’s time to reach out.
Appreciate the people in your life. Make your circles tighter, but nicer. Be stronger, be bolder, be braver.
Quarantine Times is an Opinion column written and created by Roshni Revankar ‘22 to discuss tips on dealing with life in quarantine, such as productivity and mental health.
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