Valentine’s Day has got to be one of the most divisive national holidays there is. Some people go all-out, buying their significant others ginormous bears and enough chocolate to feed a small village. Other couples boycott the holiday, saying that they should be showing affection to their partner every day, not just one particular day each year. Some singles ignore it, while others turn it on its head in favor of something like “Galentine’s Day” as an opportunity to hang out with friends. Regardless of how you do (or don’t) celebrate, relationships are a tricky subject that I think people sometimes overthink and take too seriously. So, let’s talk about it.
As of this being published, Valentine’s Day will have already passed. There were the usual social media posts, surprise flowers, and trips to the fanciest dinners that broke college students can afford. For those that have someone to enjoy those things with, it’s a nice occasion to get a little dressed-up and show your affection to each other. For those that don’t, however, it’s easy to get self-conscious. Although this is the first Valentine’s Day that I’ve actually had someone to share it with, I vividly remember in years past getting pretty down on myself when I saw everyone posting on social media about their “perfect Valentine’s Day.” It can feel like a competition between people for “who loves their SO the most” or “whose relationship is the most #goals.” And that’s where the problem comes in.
There’s nothing inherently wrong with Valentine’s Day. It should be a time to emphasize your love and how much you care for your partner. But the era of social media has twisted the day into a flurry of commercialization and Instagram posts with romantic song lyrics. If we’re being honest with ourselves, that’s not what love is, and that shouldn’t be the focus of our relationships either. It can feel like people are trying to shove it down their followers’ throats and say, “Look how in love we are!” Even though it may be fun to post constantly about your partner on every platform possible, that’s not how we should be celebrating our affection.
Now, I’m not going to say you should never post about your relationship, because that’s not true either. Even I made a post about Valentine’s Day this year. But posting too much on social media about your relationship can often make personal things too public — and end up putting other people down with the constant reminders. It’s a difficult thing: you want to show your affection for one another, but doing it too much can tarnish what you have. Just being aware of it, though, is a good start.
If you’re in a relationship, enjoy it. I hope you had a nice Valentine’s Day and had the opportunity to spend quality time with your partner. It’s totally okay if you posted on social media, but just remember that there’s more to love than likes and comments. And if you’re single, enjoy the freedom. Just because you don’t have a partner right now doesn’t make you any less worthy or wanted.
Finally, make a choice to spread the love every day, not just Valentine’s Day. And that means to everyone, not just your partner. Not only will random acts of kindness make someone’s day, I promise it’ll make you feel good, too, knowing that you’re making the world a little brighter.
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