Press "Enter" to skip to content

Posts published in “Past Opinion Columns”

2018 Presidential Report Card

It’s been a wild year in the jungle of politics, so I think it’s only right that we go back and look at what has happened over the past year.

Report Card for Donald J. Trump: 2018

Classroom: Penn, 1600
Teacher: Kelly, J
Reporter: Doto, M


Dear Parent,
This report card is intended to update you on the progress of your child, Donald, in the year 2018.

In Defense of Wasps

“Save the whales!” “Save the pandas!” “Save the bees!” All are phrases commonly heard amongst so-called animal activists. One never sees this same cry of sympathy for some of America’s most valuable and beloved insects — wasps.

Thanksgiving Guilt Trip

The approach of Thanksgiving, that quintessential American holiday, has me brooding once again over scientists’ slanderous portrayals of Native Americans as bellicose brutes.

Yeezy, Yeezy, Yeezy jumped over Jumpman?

Kanye West has been busy throughout the year, releasing at least one shoe per month. His footwear line Yeezy collaboration with adidas either already released or is planning to release several shoes: adidas Yeezy Boost 700 “Mauve” and “Static;” adidas Yeezy 500 “Salt” and “Ultraviolet;” adidas Yeezy Boost 350 v2 in “Triple White,” “Zebra,” “Sesame,” “Semi-Frozen Yellow,” and “Static.”

Enough with the useless recounts

Enough is enough. We go through this almost every time there is an election. “I lost, so I want a recount!”

Every vote counts

Last week, the midterm elections happened. This week, the recounts. Florida is proving itself ostensibly incompetent at counting ballots, an observation made all the less acceptable given that it’s been 18 years since 2000 saw scandal in the race between George W.