“Closing time, you don’t have to go home, but you can’t stay here.” Those are words that have been echoing in my head lately. It’s all well and good to hear this song when closing out a bar, but what if the place you have to leave soon is your home? Stevens, not where I grew up, is the place I have lived the longest without any disruption or moving around. I have lived on campus all five years of my academic career. From Jonas, to Palmer (PRE-renovations), to the first (and longest continuous) official resident of Harries Tower, I have come to think of campus and Hoboken as home. Which isn’t all that surprising considering I don’t know if I ever felt at home “back home.” The clean slate and independence of college had been calling my name for a while, especially given the outbreak of COVID. You have to wonder: What is so special about starting new chapters in your life? Just how do new beginnings work?
“Closing time, every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.” My high school experience ended not with a bang but with a whimper. I finished my last class shirtless in my bedroom, following the same routine I had for months: wake up, work out till I saw stars, eat, finish my schoolwork in two-ish hours, and then vegetate. I was (and still am) a socially anxious fella, but everybody has their limit. The first step I made on campus was not a step but a jump. I went directly into my truck bed, picked up my mini fridge, and jumped down from it right in front of Jonas. My RA, Cam, whom I still call and talk to quite regularly to this day, told me later he thought I would be his worst nightmare as a resident. An athletics coach who was helping with move-in asked me if I was planning on playing any sports here at Stevens. Both came as a shock to somebody who had always been stereotyped as a goody two-shoes and unable to hit the red side of a barn. They did not know a thing about me, nobody did! As a matter of fact, I did not know a thing about myself either.
“I know who I want to take me home.” I decided when I came here that I wanted to be somebody who got the most out of life. To love fully, despair sincerely, and everything in between. The boy who could not run a mile straight in grade school cross country has run a marathon. The boy who kept his bangs long so he would not look people in the eye has given speeches to hundreds and joined Greek Life. The boy who could never win a single student council election became something of a campus leader. Every little time you learn something new about yourself or take a leap of faith is a new beginning in and of itself. Home is where you have the comfort to grow into yourself. New beginnings allow us to frame just about wherever we want in our lives as a starting line. So, whether it’s moving across the country, getting over a breakup, or finally trying that restaurant you have been eyeing, go on and take that leap. Take yourself home to all you love and want to be.
