On confronting harassment

Over time, being harassed has become an inevitable disruption to the motions of everyday life. Everything from catcalling on the street by strangers to outright insults to threats of violence both online and in real life has become an inescapable drain of energy that women have begrudgingly learned to cope with. The constant infringement on my boundaries and probing into my personal space once lit an anger in me strong enough to confront offenders when I was younger, when I had the motivation to yell and curse and fight back at boys who would put their hands on me or insult me. But as I got older, the playing field changed. Suddenly, I entered high school, and the men who wanted to intimidate me into accepting degradation were a head taller than me and strong enough to send me to the hospital. Then, I transitioned to college, where there is always the silent threat that your harasser knows where you live because your name is quite literally on your front door.

Simply reporting harassment actually isn’t as simple as it may seem. While most women would want nothing more than to see those who infringe on their being face consequences for it, many women don’t report these incidents for a variety of reasons. Everything from being afraid of not being believed or understood to fear that the perpetrator might retaliate in response to facing consequences may prevent women from feeling safe or comfortable reporting harassment. Additionally, women often become stuck in a conflict where the long-term effects of reporting harassment might be more harmful than the harassment itself.

Sometimes, just putting up with being mistreated seems like the better alternative to the intimidating process of getting your professor, boss, school, or the police involved, especially when reporting often means that you will have to make major adjustments to your life because someone else decided to not treat you with respect. Whether reporting could mean your coworkers or fellow students find out about a situation you would like to keep contained, or you might have to go through the unnerving process of making a police report, it’s important to not stay quiet about harassment. Women should be able to feel confident and safe enough to be open about harassment so that offenders do not continue to victimize others. When harassers face consequences, not only are they told that their actions are unacceptable, but the silent bystanders of abuse also realize that these behaviors are harmful and have real consequences.