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Posts published in “Year: 2024

Alleged Secret Society Lives in Academic Buildings

I have uncovered an alleged secret society of Snevets students that live in the academic buildings at night. Upon preliminary investigation, I found they have three distinct sectors.

Who needs S.S. Snevets? Defective 737 to become dorm

The recent petition to restore the old floating dorm to the Hudson may have ended in failure, but loath to disappoint, President Narfarvar announced something even more unique: A Boeing 737 will be turned into new first-year housing.

Snevets commencement to be virtual

As the commencement ceremony date quickly approaches 2024, the administration has released a concerning announcement for this upcoming spring: commencement will take place over Zoom this year following many issues in the past years and while letting graduating students reminiscent of their high school graduation over Zoom in the height of the pandemic. 

Notes from a daily Scrum

Editor’s note: This is documentation purporting to contain notes from a so-called “Scrum,” that arcane and masochistic ritual particular to certain breeds of software engineer.

Battle of the Bands 2024

Battle of the Bands 2024 is taking place on Sunday, March 24 at 7 p.m. in the Bissinger Room. This event is a showcase of student bands and the winners have the opportunity to open for Techfest 2024, the biggest Entertainment Committee campus event of the year.

New multipurpose building to replace Davis by 2032

Davis Hall’s days are numbered. In the most recent report on the university’s 10-year strategic plan, there is a line item on page 74 about Davis Hall, the first-year dormitory building, and its potential replacement.

Advisory boards give students a voice

Within the four schools at Stevens, each offers a unique opportunity for students to participate actively in their education: a student advisory board.