So obviously, you’re here reading because you want to hear all of the excellent advice I have to give, so this week is no exception: I will be revealing the keys to success, the secrets to how to succeed, or more precisely, how to get a solid Victory Royale in Fortnite.
So to be completely candid, I am not the most qualified to be giving this advice, given that the first time that I touched an Xbox controller for something other than using streaming services was a little over a year ago. However, I will say that since the first time my roommate convinced me to hop on the battle bus, my life has been changed for the better (which, side note, is a super funny thing for me to have written because my roommates and I all have bracelets that say “for good” from Wicked because in one of the songs it says “because I knew you I have been changed for the better … because I knew you my life has changed for good”). I would normally delete a tangent such as this, but this is not the real Stute, so you have to deal with it, and I have a word count to hit!
Okay, so once again, I will remind everyone that I AM NOT AT ALL CLAIMING TO BE AN EXPERT. I am a mediocre Fortnite player, especially compared to my 16-year-old brother, who has been playing since the game’s initial release. (And fun fact: me starting to play Fortnite is what took us from siblings who hate each other to friends <3). However, I do have a number of victory royales under my belt and somewhat of a strategy that I will be sharing with you, my loyal following. Basically, I try to land somewhere where there aren’t a lot of others (avoid conflict = good in Fortnite and bad in real life) and then build up a solid arsenal with some kind of health or shield, and try to get a decent spread of weapons. Then, for most games that I play, I let the quests and the lure of nearby chests guide my way. I severely bother everyone who plays with me with how fixated I am on leveling up to make the most of getting the battle pass.
So yeah, you probably don’t really want to hear what I have to say that much, but I can offer up some expert advice from a carefully curated panel of epic gamers (the people who responded to my texts). First, from the absolute beast himself, my brother, MegaDabLoL, his strategy involves finding an ideal location to land. For this current season, his ideal landing spot is the off-shore wind turbines at the edge of the map. There is tons of loot, and no one else is ever there; plus, there’s a launchpad, so you can easily get to other parts of the map quickly. FlakJacketJay gives two pieces of advice: “make sure to thank the bus driver. You are more likely to get epic items if you do!” I agree with this, showing your appreciation for the bus driver makes the world a better place by spreading kindness. He also adds that “visual sound indicators aren’t just for [people with impaired hearing], they can also give you a leg up on locating your competition and when locating chests!” Just be careful, the visual sound effects can also cause you to absolutely lose your mind when you cannot find the chest that they are telling you is nearby, just ask puppyboomer11 about that one. I will leave you with some impactful advice from the wise Copsal: “just because you’re in the storm doesn’t mean the game is over; the smaller the circle, the better the people; it’s not about where you land it’s about where the storm takes you; sometimes when you’re losing a battle you have to break it down.” Wow, some really inspiring stuff.
See you on the island,
OreoDestroyer98
Disclaimer: This article is part of The Stupe and is satire.
