Despite being well into the 21st century, there have been few significant advancements in performing arts technology. However, senior Music & Technology student Jack Peters has achieved what many are hailing as the biggest breakthrough in the field. Peters is set to unveil his experimental multi-media senior thesis project at this month’s Innovation Expo.
After 92 grueling nights and with the help of sponsor Monster Energy, who generously donated their product and $2.1 million towards his research, Peters has finally discovered the key to revolutionizing the world of performance art. His groundbreaking idea: integrating household furniture into his stage productions. Peters has found that chairs are the perfect partner for music, and his performance, “Chair-ical Music,” is poised to change the game. In fact, Peters is open to alternative name suggestions from the student body for his performance.
The audience is in for a treat with Peters’ display. Participants will walk in a circle around chairs while music plays. When the music stops, they’ll scramble to find a seat. Whoever fails to sit on a chair is removed from the stage. This is repeated until only one participant remains, who is declared the “winner” of the performance. Yet, Peters believes that the true winner is the audience, enriched by the experience.
The chairs used in Peters’ Innovation Expo debut will be on display, replacing the beloved horse statue on the lawn in the center of Snevets’ upper campus. Furthermore, Peters’ head will be cryogenically frozen in Humphrey’s basement to preserve his genius in the event that his genius is ever needed to be called upon to save the world… or the Snevets corporation.
Disclaimer: This article is part of The Stupe and is satire.
