There is a famously notorious statistic regarding how poorly we keep our fitness-related New Year’s resolutions. At the beginning of every year, gym memberships are up around fifteen percent and by the end of the year, new members are in the negatives as more people bail on their newly minted aims for the year. Like many, we start off the New Year with our list of resolutions and goals for the upcoming year. However, few of us follow through with these goals. A poll done by the Society for Personality and Social Psychology found that roughly 41% of Americans consistently make New Year’s resolutions. Of those that make New Year’s resolutions, only 9% feel they were successful in fulfilling their goal for the year.
So why are we so disjointed from what we want to do and what we actually do? This does not uniquely speak to just New Year’s resolutions, think back to anytime you have made a goal and not succeeded in upholding that goal. Where did we fall short?
There are plenty of reasons people do not achieve their goals: we make goals our chores, we do not set the proper incentives, or we lack the motivation both internally and from others to succeed.
There is ample literature on what people can do to change their habits to set successful goals. One book that stands out is Atomic Habits, by James Clear. But what I would like to uniquely focus on is how we can learn from our past failures to set more effective and achievable goals for the future. We tend to make the same goals and fail to succeed again and again. For instance, 44% of people set out to lose weight nearly every year, and 34% of those people do not succeed in doing so. So what can that 34% of people learn from their past failures and how can we use that to make more effective and successful goals?
Let’s take Oliver for example. Oliver is one of the 34% of people who year over year cannot seem to lose weight after numerous attempts. Although Oliver has been unsuccessful in achieving his goals, he is likely quite knowledgeable about weight loss given all of his efforts. Despite his lackluster results, Oliver could be practically an expert at that point in weight loss.
Researcher and bestselling author Aylet Fishbach says “people don’t recognize the knowledge they’re gaining as they struggle”. We all have worked endlessly to attain a goal that never seems to be achieved, but what we often fail to realize is just because we may have not been successful with our own goals does not mean that we lack the knowledge to achieve them.
What we can do with that knowledge is even more powerful as well. Research from Angela Duckworth and Fishbach showed that when we use our knowledge to teach others about what we have learned we are even more motivated than we receive advice. For instance, if Oliver decided to give weight loss advice to a friend with a similar goal he is more likely to buckle down and start eating a healthier diet than before. “Strugglers who gave advice, compared with those who received expert advice, were more motivated” to achieve their goals.
Hillary Clinton in 2008 lost the democratic nomination for President. After losing she coached and worked alongside President Obama later to serve on his cabinet as secretary of state. Despite her loss the first time she advised and gave insightful advice to President Obama sharing her vast array of knowledge. Years later she ran for president again and performed significantly better than 2008, Clinton won the popular vote, and became the first woman to secure the nomination from a major United States political party for president. We are surprisingly knowledgeable in regards to our unsuccessful goals and this knowledge is too valuable to be unappreciated and it is self-sacrificing to withhold.
Stop underestimating yourself. No one was ever successful alone. Believe in yourself and believe in others. Best of luck and Happy New Year!
Be First to Comment