Now

I hadn’t wanted to live in the present

Because I never liked the present I lived in,

Whether it was because of workloads,

Or friends with no time for me,

Or just horrible people and circumstances in general.

I’d anticipate, fantasize, and idealize my future,

One that was better than my now.

Now I yearn for my past,

Because you were and still are the best now I ever lived for.