The support you need is there

I first learned of yesterday’s train crash at Hoboken Terminal through the Orientation Leaders Groupme. An OL asked if anybody was at the terminal and if everybody was okay and reminded everyone to check on commuter friends and friends who commute into the city. I checked my newsfeed which was filled with fellow students posting that they were safe. I also received several texts and Facebook messages asking if I and people I knew were okay. I was very shocked to hear of the train accident, and scared thinking of so many fellow classmates who could have possibly been commuting. Thankfully, nobody I knew was in the accident.

This made me think of how close the Stevens community is and how glad I am that I go to small school. A lot of friend-circles are connected to each other on campus, which means that people you aren’t even that close with still know your face and name and care about you if you aren’t safe and well.

Even though my recent struggles are not nearly as endangering or serious as yesterday’s incident, I just want to say that you shouldn’t be afraid to tap into the supportive community that is Stevens. There are more people than you think who care about you, even those distant acquaintances.

If you need someone to hear you, if you need fresh advice, or just person to tell your that your feelings are real, you can find the support you need from people who don’t even know you that well.

For me, this came from kind Stute alumni, executive board members, Stevens Student Life staff, and other campus leaders who related to me and reached out to say that they had similar troubles in the past.

I also want to use this column to tell people that I am so willing to be a friend and listen to anyone who needs to vent. If you’re reading this thinking “I have no friends” or “I feel like nobody cares,” please send me an email or stop by The Stute office.

If you really think about it, there’s probably at least one person at Stevens who you relate to and hangout with occasionally, and they would probably really care about you if you opened up to them.

I know I sometimes struggle with knowing who my friends are at Stevens. My mother used to say, “You’re lucky if you have one true friend in life,” meaning that a lot of people will come and go in your life, and you’re lucky if you find only a few close, life-time friends. I think I get hung-up on this a little too much. I guess I just keep to myself more.

Meanwhile, my one friend has a really loose definition of the word friend. He includes pretty much anyone in the same clubs and any classmates he talks to. He says hi to everyone on campus (which, don’t get me wrong, I used to do this too, but he does it way more often to people I think he barely knows).

I think I’ll start trying to from closer friendships and reaching out to people more, because finding your support network is so important. The support you need to get through college is here, you just have to reach out a little more and find it.