Thoughts on roommates in college

I love the Office of Residence Life very much, with a few exceptions: When they are telling me my string contraptions are fire hazards, when they tell me I can’t stay in my River Terrace apartment for more than a year, and when they tell me I need a meal plan.

Aside from that, Residence Life is perfectly fine, and they are quite friendly to work with on resolving problems.

But rather than talking about housing, where to go and what your best options are, I am going to talk about interacting with people who live with you. Somewhere else in this newspaper, there is a handy guide that tells you all about the housing options and associated costs, meal plans, and locations.

To begin, when I first joined this school, I was paired with a guy named TJ. I still see him around campus, great guy. We were worlds apart in terms of personality: he loved to party, I loved to stay inside; he watched Blue Mountain State, I watched Full Metal Alchemist; he played sports, I wrote for the newspaper. I think you get the idea.

Was it weird? Not at all. On day one, we, two people with no knowledge of the other, addressed our likes, dislikes, boundaries, and any rules that we could come up with: how to signal to leave the room when one of us brought home company, when the amount of friends in the room was too much, when we would both stop doing what we were doing and turn off the lights so the other could sleep, and wakeup rituals. It worked pretty darn well.

The next semester came, and I partnered with two of my Computer Science friends in CPH (CPA at the time) and that year was a lot rougher. Maybe it was trying to cram three men into a housing situation meant for a husband, wife, and child, but no matter. There were more disputes, it was harder to settle things, arguments were constant.

Don’t get me wrong, we were, and still are, great buddies. And, for the most part, living with them was fun. But part of it was very stressful, and I know living with strangers MIGHT have been a lot easier.

However, I also understand the counter-argument. I have heard horror stories from my father back in Michigan who lived with a Satanist for a year (my father is a born and bred Catholic). And even here, I have heard of stories of strange roommates who would wake up immediately if you bumped their bed, or act like complete assholes because they don’t like you.

So, what is my advice? It is complicated. If you are looking for a housing partner, there are two options: go with someone you know, or someone you don’t know.

If you know them, be prepared! It won’t be all fun and games and party time all the time. When semesterly stress kicks in, tensions rise and you will find it hard to keep peace with your friends-turned-roommates. If your bond is not strong, or you aren’t chill enough to deal with it, rooming with your friends can easily tear the bonds you have with them apart.

Alternatively, if you don’t know them, the best you can do is relax and take everything easily. Everyone is weird and has wacko tendencies when they are at home. Try not to judge, because no one wants to feel uncomfortable where they live. Besides, if everyone is following this advice, your roommate(s) will be trying not to judge you too. Try to act as normal and chill as possible, (this goes for everyone) and everything will work out just fine. In hindsight, this is kind of related to last week’s article on relationship woes. If you aren’t relaxed and chill, bad things will always happen. So just relax! Life isn’t worth having an aneurysm over.

If you can make friends with your strange roommates, then that is probably the best thing that can happen while choosing a roommate. And if you manage to get through the semester without killing each other, then I guess that is good too.