The path less traveled by

Robert Frost once wrote, “I took the road less traveled by, and that has made all the difference”.

Growing up, I had a rough father. He was, and is, probably the best man I’ll ever know. He never really drank, never smoked, never hit my mother; he was always a guy you could rely on, and still is. He was really rough on me though, in the sense that he wanted me to grow up to be a man like him. I had to be a moral paradigm in order to be successful. So he raised me accordingly.

No matter the altercation, I had to do what was right. What I wanted was usually irrelevant. If I was fighting with my little brother, no matter how trivial, if he got away with whatever he was doing, I had to abide. Revenge was forbidden and gritting my teeth and bearing it was all I was allowed to do. “Be the better man” was the creed, and you better believe I got used to it, especially if I am getting the short end of the stick.

Most people don’t live their lives this way. I’d imagine they think that it isn’t rewarding enough. Why do I bother with it? Well, it is kind of hard to describe. It’s like you’re driving a car, and you make it a mission to hit every pothole you see on the road. Yes, your car will break down, that is inevitable. When it does, you’ll have to get a new tire or suspension, but you’ll know how to deal with these problems for the next time that they come around when you don’t expect it to.

So, in a sense, this approach to life and its problems causes even more frustration than you already would have been, but it teaches you how to deal with that frustration better. Someone who hasn’t hit enough potholes is probably going to freak out after an accident, but if you’ve been fixing your car enough, you’ll know that it is no big deal, just a few adjustments and you’re back on the road.

That said, I am aware that it is not wise to hit every pothole down the road. Sometimes it is wiser to avoid potholes on the road, and as such, it is best to avoid such altercations if at all possible. But sometimes it is impossible to dodge the pothole, and likewise, it is occasionally impossible to avoid such altercations. But at least you’ll know how to handle yourself when you are stressed out and frustrated.

Of course, there is another point to this as well: often there is more in an altercation than your own feelings. While your own feelings are important, it is very important to consider the position of others. Odds are, they won’t see it from this perspective, and they won’t care about how you might feel in the situation. In times like these, it is probably best to just grit your teeth and bear it. If you are right, and you know you are right, make your stance clear, and the rest will work itself out in time. You must have patience to watch yourself be proven correctly over time.

It is difficult taking this path. It is stressful, annoying, and makes you feel like crap along the way for the most part. But you can become a stronger person for holding your head up through it, and taking the blows.

It is the path less traveled by, and taking it sets you apart from the rest.